A Songwriter's Secret Life

Everything happens for a reason.

Tag: big in a small town

It’s like a 6th sense you can’t control.


Songwriting. It’s like a 6th sense you can’t control. The melody or lyrics will come to you out of nowhere. And they do not care what you’re doing at that moment. They’re coming, and if you don’t catch them quick, you might lose them.

Seriously, I could be knee deep in laundry, baggy sweater and pants on, hair thrown up into a messy bun and the lyrics to a love song pop into my mind.

Like C’MON brain. I’m busy. Jeez.

And you can try and keep going, simultaneously repeating the lyrics in your mind over and over again… but then the more you repeat it, the more it changes—or the more you think it changes—you start over-analyzing.  Then you’re not sure if it’s the same as when it first popped into your mind. Then you get frustrated, focus on what you were doing and…

POOF. It’s gone. Bye bye #1 hit. (lolz).

So, to avoid this disaster, I frantically lunge for my songwriting book (which I keep on my person at all times now)… slippers falling off, tripping over laundry… (ps, I’m pretty on top of laundry. I can see how it may now sound like I have mountains of it that I slave over. I don’t. I’m just being dramatic :3)… I also have to make sure I use my songwriting pen. I’m really anal about my songwriting ‘gear’ I s’pose. The husband has gone to use the pen a couple of times and I’m like “NOOOOOO you can’t it’s sacred!”

Husband gives me a sideways look, looks a little concerned for my mental state and says, “Ooookay then…”

I’m so lucky he’s still married to me. Hah.

Anyway, sometimes, you don’t accomplish much in a day because you’re busy songwriting and EVERY moment you go to do something else, more lyrics happen to appear… and you can’t lose them. So the husband will come home and ask what I did today, surrounded by PILES of dishes, laundry, dust-bunnies (I’m seriously kidding) and I say,

“Not much, but I wrote a FANTASTIC SONG!!!” 

*Super hero pose*



‘Like’ your fave artist!

‘Like’ your fave artist!

Don’t forget to ‘like’ your fave artist from last night’s episode on the CMT website! You have until Wednesday next week to ‘like’ your favourites as many times as you want 🙂

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Thanks for your ongoing support xox


My Worst Critic

They say you’re your own worst critic. Sometimes I wonder if that’s worse than someone else criticizing you… I think it’s easier to ignore negativity when it’s coming from others than it is coming from within yourself. 

I was anxious for the show to air. I knew my performance wasn’t where I wanted it to be, but it all happened so quickly that I couldn’t really remember how far off it was from my scale of “acceptability”. Well, it was off. Way off. And no matter how much the people around me cheered me on, I couldn’t get past it. 

I received tons of emails and notifications about my appearance on the show… I was so happy and thankful to have so many people supporting me… but the side of me that was still kicking myself wasn’t allowing me to enjoy the experience to it’s fullest. 

Not one person had a negative comment. No one except for me. 

You know that Taylor Swift song called “Mean”? The one she wrote about that critic who was a complete jerk and belittled her for her performance at the Grammy’s? I was that guy last night—to myself. I can’t be that guy. I had the opportunity of a lifetime and there I was, getting upset about one measly performance. The exposure that I got from this experience is the biggest shot I’ll ever get at making this a bigger part of my life. 

I am so thankful for everything this show has brought to my life. It helped me learn who I was as an artist and grow into a stronger vocalist and grow my confidence. I mean, I gotta give myself a break here. I hid away my passion for this for years, and the first time I sing my own material was on a CMT show. That’s pretty freaking awesome.

I think one day I’ll look back at this and laugh.


“Someday, I’ll be living in a big ol’ city, and all you’re ever gonna be is mean.

Why you gotta be so mean?”


Things that get me pretty psyched.

– Waiting for Big In A Small Town to air. This gets me excited. And anxious. And nervous. And excited. 🙂

– Having well known people follow me on twitter… I have under 40 followers… and when someone who works in the music industry (LIKE FREAKING BIG MACHINE RECORDS) starts following you, you get excited. But don’t tell them I said that. I’m afraid they won’t think I’m cool and stop following me. (Side note: that’s Taylor Swift’s record company. Ya.)

– Writing new songs that I think are actually awesome. I get this tingly feeling in my stomach and my arms when I’ve written something I love. It’s weird.

– Hanging out with Taylor Swift (…on a live chat on youtube) and…


– FINDING OUT her new album is called RED and comes out OCTOBER 22ND and…

– HEARING her new single called “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together”… which is PHENOMENAL. 

I’m using caps because I actually would be screaming it–that is, if I wasn’t alone in my living room with my two dogs who would be suddenly very frightened of me.

Oh oh oh!!

– AND, that the song she co-wrote with Ed Sheeran WILL BE ON THE ALBUM.

Okay I’m done screaming now.



PS: I super promise to have a song ready for you to hear by the time the show airs. :3